PoT-ness

Thanks to Sonia for this! ((:
I can't say much more than that there isn't a finer PoT Cosplay team around XPP

Flying off

I'm flying off in -counts quickly- 10 hours' time! (: Oh boy oh boy! I can almost taste the honey-back ribs over a hot charcoal grill... and the smell of large cookies all around a tinsel-covered, christmas lights-lit town ~ ^^ Okay. So I'm romanticizing... but let me to my imagination ((: and while you're at it, wish me journey mercy and Godspeed!

I've always had a problem with flying though... I mean, the prospects of crashing. I know the odds are terribly low. More often than not, when a plane crashes, every nation knows about it and the whole world weeps for your soul. I know I know - Touchwood. But the night before the flight, I will never fail to have this terrible rumbling in the nether regions of my stomach that braces me for the possibility of leaving this world - and you my lovely reader, behind. I mean, I'm not afraid (if God suddenly says its my time). I know where I'm going (: My only regret, would be all those times I committed sins unto God and unto the people around me and have not repaid it yet to that person, or even sought for their forgiveness. That's why I cross my fingers when we fly and pray for good weather.

The Lament of Sharyl
I've done my share of foolish things in the past.. and all in all, I've hurt many many people. But I think I've hurt more people not doing things than actually doing anything. My APATHY is my greatest vice and I intend to change that! ... later. Haha. See?!

But quick to the point, to everyone and anyone that I've made angry, frustrated, cry, sad or even harbour a little of antagonistic feeling towards me, I'm sorry. Its my fault and I'll do my best to change. And I really mean it this time... As 2009 comes to an end, and 2010 comes, I can't guarantee Sharyl will change. But it will be Sharyl and the determination to change ((: and I'll make it a reality. With plenty of help from God, of course ^^

Once again, I'm sorry for all the heartache and trouble I've caused... please, if I could help in any way, tell me (: Let it be my burden to bear. -hugs-

And just in case (not saying that it will), I don't make it back from this (or any other trip), let it be documented here that I love each and every one of you (: And my intentions towards all of you, have been nothing but the best at this moment of sanity and clear-thought. I'd wish you the world, if it'd come true... but while I'm still working on that, I wish you the best you can muster ((: and all that I can muster, till my dying breath. I love you. I really do.

With more love,
Sharyl

A reminder (:

Sometimes, we need a little nudge to remind us that we're being too proud and living life wrong... sometimes we need a real good shove XD Either way, I thank You God, for having the patience to test me in flames, break and re-mold me and forge me within the fires ^^ I know in time I will be a brilliant diamond by Your hand! But until that day, I will do my best to live right! And that means to stop being so proud XD I just want to be more and more like You everyday (:

Yours Sincerely,
Sharyl

My Prayer for You - from God

John 17:20

"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.

"Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world.

"Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them."

Sometimes, Jesus, I wonder how much You cried that night...
How tight You plastered Your palms together...
How much You loved us that night...

I'll never know.
Words will never express exactly how much You sacrificed.
But with all I do know, I thank You for each bead of blood-sweat You shed
And every tear that hit that hallowed ground.
God, I surrender to Your love (:

Thank You.

Running with God

What an adventure!

I wonder what makes a person to even start to conceive a crazy thought. However it happens, it sparked off something in me last night. And BOOM! Suddenly I'm running with nothing but my handphone, bus pass, mp3 and house keys en route to Bukit Timah via Holland Road. Yup! I don't even know how long that is. But no matter! =DD

Okay... so I cheated. I didn't run ALL the way. I didn't know how to get from Jurong East to Clementi, so I took the train through that part. Don't worry! I drank a GALLON of water before setting off ((: And then I found out that even if you stop to walk (quite) a bit, it takes you approximately 2 hours to get to Liz's house (That's on Coronation Drive). Well... minus all the wrong turns you take because you're utterly lost in Liz's Estate XDD haha.

Looking outside my window now, the dark clouds are starting to form. Usually, I'd have a terrible sense of foreboding, because I'd think God was angry at me... But now, I'm feeling more relief (: Like God held back the rain because He knew I was running. The night before, my prayer went something along the lines of,

"Dear God, I know You know that I'm crazy. And I want to run to Bukit Timah tomorrow... will You come with me? I know You'll protect me. And I'll make it through (:"

And boy did He! (: Throughout the not-so-gruelling run, it felt like someone was beside me, pacing me and making sure I didn't fall or hurt myself. Even when I was lost in Liz's estate, there was someone egging me on to be bold and try another route. I know He was there too when Liz and I were running in the hot midday sun (:

Its 1.31pm now. The day has barely begun! ((: And I'm glad it began with God.

Dear God,

Thank You so much for accepting my invitation to run! I'm so sorry You have to put up with my eccentric tendencies and weird ideas... Thank you also for keeping the weather nice and warm (not too hot) and for staying the rain until I reached home ^^ God... I'm so glad that I have such an awesome life and I get to do this and have what seems like everything in the world! I know somewhere along the way, there'll be times I want to die again... but I pray that I'll remember this time and be thankful (: I'm growing up (although I don't look like it) and I'm learning new things (: But even as I move on to longer routes, higher mountains and deeper seas... can I hold Your hand through it all?

With love,
Sharyl

P.S. Love you God.


Note to Liz: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR RUNNING WITH ME TODAY! ((: AND OH MY GOODNESS YOU'VE GOTTEN SO AMAZINGLY THIN!! KEEP IT UP! ((: WE'LL TRIM DOWN TO 45 KG TOGETHER!! I LOVE YOU!

How Great Thou Art (:

Dear God,

Everytime I forget about what You've taught me, You always remind me of Your greatness (: And dear God, I am redeemed again ((: In the darkness of this blighted night, Your comforting embrace has lifted me high about my iniquities. I can still remember the conclusion we came to, dear God, about why I'm short... Haha. We laughed so much about it ((: It has been too long since I've laughed with You...

Why Sharyl is Short
You used to say that my height was a representation of the one trait I should always keep close to me (: - Child-like behaviour. I mean... no screaming and running around doing stupid Childish things. But to remain innocent, inquisitive and above all - to be most willing to love, to be hurt and to forgive. God, I still feel hurt when people tease me about my height, sometimes. However, I'll stand proudly at 150 cm (: Because no matter what the magazines and the television sets say about height, I'm sticking to my height. Because this World means nothing to me and I'm flying straight into Your arms. God, I'll gladly be short for you ^^ I'll be your child-like muffinstrawberrypie daughter-of-God (: Forever and ever. and ever.

I'll stand on top of a mountain and shout that out, Oh God (: So You'll be able to hear it without straining too much from Your Throne (just kidding). Dear God, I live another day. But no longer for me, for my family, for Edmund or my friends. But for YOU. And God here, I proudly shout out to the entire world to hear! Crazy I may be, but only because I'm Crazy For God! ((:

With much love,
Sealed in regret and repentance,
Sharyl





Hey God...
please.
Take the wheel from me

青花瓷

青花瓷 Qing Hua Ci
作词：方文山 Lyrics by: Vincent Fang
作曲：周杰伦 Composed by Jay Chou

Translated by : Suet Mei (myJAYsian)

素胚勾勒出青花笔锋浓转淡　
su bei gou le chu qing hua bi feng nong zhuan dan
瓶身描绘的牡丹一如你初妆
ping shen miao hui de mu dan yi ru ni chu zhuang
冉冉檀香透过窗心事我了然
ran ran tan xiang tou guo chuang xin shi wo liao ran　
宣纸上走笔至此搁一半
xuan zhi shang zou bi zhi ci ge yi ban

釉色渲染仕女图韵味被私藏　
you se xuan ran shi nu tu yun wei bei si cang
而你嫣然的一笑如含苞待放
er ni yan ran de yi xiao ru han bao dai fang
你的美一缕飘散　
ni de mei yi lu piao san
去到我去不了的地方
qu dao wo qu bu liao de di fang

＃天青色等烟雨　而我在等你　
　tian qing se deng yan yu er wo zai deng ni
　炊烟袅袅升起　隔江千万里
　cui yan miao miao sheng qi ge jiang qian wan li
　在瓶底书汉隶仿前朝的飘逸　
　zai ping di shu han li fang qian chao de piao yi
　就当我为遇见你伏笔
　jiu dang wo wei yu jian ni fu bi

＊天青色等烟雨　而我在等你
　tian qing se deng yan yu er wo zai deng ni
　月色被打捞起　晕开了结局
　yue se bei da lao qi yun kai le jie ju
　如传世的青花瓷自顾自美丽　
　ru chuan shi de qing hua ci zi gu zi mei li
　你眼带笑意
　ni yan dai xiao yi

色白花青的锦鲤跃然于碗底
se bai hua qing de jing li yue ran yu wan di　
临摹宋体落款时却惦记着你
ling mo song ti luo kuan shi que dian ji zhe ni
你隐藏在窑烧里千年的秘密　
ni ying cang zai yao shao li qian nian de mi mi
极细腻犹如绣花针落地
ji xi ni you ru xiu hua zhen luo di

帘外芭蕉惹骤雨门环惹铜绿　
lian wai ba jiao re zhou yu men huan re tong lv
而我路过那江南小镇惹了你
er wo lu guo na jiang nan xiao zhen re le ni
在泼墨山水画里　
zai po mo shan shui hua li
你从墨色深处被隐去
ni chong mo se shen chu bei ying qu

Some songs were just never meant to be translated (:
I love you, English. But Chinese is right.
There are some things you can't do.
But I remain faithful ((: ... and a little adulterous.

花木兰

The Official End-of-Exams Post


Okay. I sectioned it. If you don't want to hear this portion, please proceed to the next one, comprendo?~ (: I even have the music to match! For like Socrates once said, the melody is a vital part of a play and of life.




The Emo Portion
Yup! Its the end of my exams but for some reason, all the hype about the end of exams isn't really all I made it out to be. The end of exams kinda ushered in a few disappointments for me. For example, I lost my matriculation in the sea of people rushing out of the hall. Haha. I bet its stuck to someone's shoe right this moment. But we shouldn't talk about depressing things! Because God is good and bad things never last (: ... I suppose its partially because I find it infinitely impossible to really talk about bad things on a blog. The world's messed up as it is.

Donovan told me yesterday that I had to be the happiest girl in the world. Well, I'm not. Its just that I've seen enough gore, made enough mistakes, given my heart away to things that turn on me too many times and cried enough tears to know that nothing on this world is worth crying for. That's why I smile. The smile you see everyday is a fragmented one - a desperate war cry against the things that threaten to engulf me. A war cry I'm still attempting to share. And every time someone smiles, it redeems my sundered soul again.

I don't know the first thing about being truly happy, but I do know that I'm the most blessed girl in world ((: God, my Family, a good home, awesome friends and a loving boyfriend ^^ But as the world goes, it does mess up your perception of that and sometimes it feels like you're the poorest, most neglected person on earth.

But we just have to remind ourselves again ^^ There's just too much to live for.



The Happy-pappy Part
I went out with Eileen today! Haha. She told me to pick any movie, so I picked out 'Mulan'. Y'know, the new approximately-historically-correct film about the age-old tale of the chinese heroine who posed as a male in the Chinese army? -breathe- Haha. It turns out that its was a big loud and violent... AND INCREDULOUS! But it wasn't the killing or the pent-up Chinese emotion displayed in political dialectics that got me on the edge of my seat. (nor was it the seemingly misplaced caucasian in the Rouran camp...) It was the emotional content of the whole love-hate relationship between Hua Mulan and her duties as General (And of course her feelings for the 7th Prince). I found myself crying over and over again every time she came to an emotional impasse. Maybe its because I felt just as lost in life. But her victory over her own psychological hurdles and obstacles soon won her the place of 'General' (: A woman~

Later, I was dragged all over Jurong Point. Okay. Not dragged (: Because I was enjoying the shopping too XDD -points to new pair of shoes- They're worth it, I swear! But yes ^^ Shopping with Eileen proved to be an FANTABULOUSLY Awesome idea ((: Haha. Although Eileen was pretty tired after that (and she still had the strength to pull herself to CCK!), and I was pretty pooped out, I kinda liked being dragged around Jurong Point. Haha (: Love you, Eileen!

Oh oh! Before meeting Eileen, I met made a trip down to the LWN library to see our awesome new library friends, well, just one of them - Donovan. And he gave me a bun! (: I know it doesn't sound like much to you, but for a BREAD FANATIC like me, its like receiving a gold bar XPP An edible gold bar!

and my fingernails are now LIME GREEN

maybeonedayI'lltellyouandyou'dunderstand.untilthen,i'msorry.youweren'tsupposedtomeanthismuchtome.turnleft.I'llheadright.we'llmeetagainoneday.promisemeyou'llsmilewhenwedo.

Reminder

Phillipians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me ((: